Sunday, July 18, 2010

My colon the...moral compass?

I've come to discover that my colon, or whatever body organs are in that immediate area of my body, have become my moral compass, of sorts.  Weird?  You betcha!  It's painful too, at times. 

So as it turns out, my older brother and sister (the two right ahead of me in age) both have forms of colitis.  My assumption is that this came to be because they carry their stress down in their abdominal section, just as I do.  All of my life I've had minor problems with my guts. You know, like the irritable, stomach tied in knots kind of feelings; but in the past couple of years it seems that my colon and co. have decided to take it upon themselves to remind me when I'm trying to go against what I honestly, and most often deep down, feel is the best thing for me to do.  Since I don't ever seem to learn, and I continue to go ahead with what seems logically correct, even though it's against my inner judgement, I've begun to pay a price for it every time I do.  My stomach gets this tightly wound, tied in knots and gnarls, you shouldn't have eaten that type feeling, and my colon, or immediate area becomes very tender and sore.  Even when I have my mind made up that my decision is the most logical thing to do and the best option, I apparently cannot lie to my abdominal section.  I guess it comes down to having to trust my gut feelings more often, or face the consequences of feeling my guts in tyranny until I put up the white flag

...I can't help but wonder if this means I'm a prisoner to body, and what seem to be commitment problems, or if my gut is just smarter than my brain.

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