Monday, December 13, 2010

"Call to Arms" by Ryan Innes

As of today I've jumped on the Ryan Innes bandwagon.  The guy is a local musician who is incredible! He's on Itunes if you want to check him out, or just check out my Facebook profile.

Anyway, so Innes has a song titled "Call to Arms" in which one of the main lines is "falling in love is just a call to arms." When I heard it at first I had to laugh because I'm 100% certain that the couple of times that I can say I've actually been in love, any weapon I had got lost as it fell to the wayside while I tumbled head over heels down that slippery slope.  I listened to the song again though and really liked the message it puts across.  The song talks about how anyone worth falling in love with is worth fighting for and is worth putting yourself out there, being vulnerable all the while...okay, so I may have taken some creative license on that last little bit, but I'm confident that it's part of the message the song is delivering. I like that it seems to go against the grain of the "Hollywood romance/relationships are easy" portrayal that the media pushes so often, and that seems to be the mindset that so many people have.  Sometimes I wonder if I'm tainted myself and if that is what I'm looking for...time will tell, I guess. In the mean time, I really love this song!

Secret Selfishness

My parents send out a weekly letter to all of us kids every Sunday night via e-mail. It's something they started doing two and half years ago as a way of keeping in touch with everyone, while keeping a journal at the same time. I think it's a great idea, and have come to look forward to their letter every Sunday night.  Being someone who is horrible at keeping in touch with people, it gives seeming consistency in way of keeping in touch with my immediate family as we respond back and forth via the e-mail string.

One thing that my mom (and by mom, I'm referring to my step-mom. Just a clarification for the reader) mentioned in her part of the letter tonight was that she was talking to another woman who had a step-daughter who has never liked her (other woman, not me mum). My mom expressed gratitude to us kids for having embraced her (Now me mum) into our family, since all too often the role of a step-parent is not an easy one to fill. But what really stuck out to me was that my mom then said that we, as the children, had accepted her despite her shortcomings and flaws. Specifically, she mentioned that she realized after marrying my dad and inheriting insta-children (my term, not hers) that despite having perceived herself as not being a selfish person, she quickly realized that she actually did have quite a few secret selfish quirks that she'd never realized before.  Now, I think the world of my mom, and I think she's a saint for marrying a guy with 6 kids, but I found it interesting how I was able to relate to her in a way having had the same experience. 

Relax, I don't have kids, and I'm not married (Come to think of it, lots of my family and friends would feel better if I did, probably)! I'm referring to my mission. I thought I was a very considerate, serving person until I went on my mission, and the Lord asked for "just a little more".  Turns out, it's easy to give when it's within your comfort zone. It's when you're required to stretch just a liiiitttle further that those secret selfishnesses (5 points for making up a new word!) are exposed, or at least for me, anyway.  I felt like the kid on the playground getting hung upside down and shaken until the hidden change fell from my pockets (No, that never actually happened to me).  So having had that indirect, and unintentional reminder by my mom tonight, I think forward to getting married, then to having kids, or even just callings in the LDS church.  It's made me re-evaluate and think to myself about what I've filled my pockets with since I've been home from my mission over these past five years.  My car? A higher style of living than I need? Even just "my" time?...My conclusion?...You may have guessed it. I might need a better belt...okay, fine. A pair of pants with littler pockets.

Do You See What I See?

Haha! Don't be silly. Of course you don't...most of the time. But since I can't get over what an awesome view I have from my bedroom window, I'm going to share what I see with you.

This is one of my happy pleasures in life. Waking up to a view like this. The stillness of the morning, the lights in the distance seemingly tucked back at the base of the majestic mountains, just as dawn approaches...

Sunday, December 5, 2010

Crunch Time

This is my poor baby after I rear ended a truck yesterday afternoon.  Fortunately, my car didn't seem to sustain much damage other than body damage.  It'll still cost me the deductible and what not, but I'm confident I'll have her back to running and looking great within a couple of weeks tops.

What was really a positive experience for me with this crash is that I realized that while I do love my car, I also realize that it's only a car.  Reflecting back on the experience, the greatest thing I took away from it is knowing that there are things that matter much more in life than my car, or material belongings. They'll come and they'll go, and yeah, I'll appreciate many of them while I have them, but the bottom line is that they're just nice-ties...with that being said, I'm glad I'll still be appreciating my car for many years to come!